Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Be kind to one another

Ella is doing well, we are living life and enjoying our time together as a family! Ella is still loving dance class and her recital is just around the corner, we can't wait to see her on stage! 

I wanted to write a little bit here about something we have began experiencing. Now that Ella is out a little more around kids her age we are starting to see the way other kids act towards her when they see her scar. I'm not going to lie, so far it's not been fun. Ella has handled it all very well, but I think that's mostly because she doesn't get what they are talking about, but my heart breaks. I understand that kids are curious and don't always understand discretion, but I also think some of this is just a lack of educating kids to learn that some people are different and that is okay. Please take the time to sit down with your kids and just explain to them that it's okay to have questions, but it's not okay to be mean to someone just because they look different. Kids understand even at the early ages of 3 and 4 far more then people give them credit for. If you sit down with them and talk to them, you might be surprised by just how much they understand. I think that unfortunately most parents have seen their child be made fun of, if you have you know just how much it hurts. Please don't let your child be mean. Everyone says things that are just wrong sometimes, even well-meaning adults, but if you don't at least talk to them then you are setting them up to hurt others. Ella has been through so much that when other little kids treat her badly it's so hard not to break down and cry. I mean seriously I know they are just kids, but they should know better. the other day when Ella was approached by a little girl who said something snotty to her, Ella started to reply but the little girl made a face and stepped away so Ella just smiled at her and that was that. I was so proud of her, but I could see the confusion on her face and the smile she gave was her "brave" smile. At just 3 she knows she is being treated differently and she chooses to still smile at the ones who are being mean. I hope she always carries that kind of strength, but oh, how badly I wish she didn't have too! I am not offended by questions and I will teach Ella to be proud of her scar and her story, to use it to share the strength and love of Jesus with others, but it seems to me that some kiddos these days go straight past curious to mean and, well, quite frankly it's sad. Ella is an AMAZING person, she has been through more then most can only imagine, she is wise beyond her years, and while she is not perfect, she is kind.

Please don't feel like I'm trying to say my child is perfect, I know she will hurt people's feelings and I know I have and will hurt peoples feelings. No one is perfect, I understand that. I am just hoping this post will bring some awareness for the problems that kids that are "different" face. Kids need to know that it's not okay to treat others this way. We are all in this world learning together, may we strive to be more like Christ! My goal is to bring awareness to what life is like as a heart family, I hope to make a difference in the world my daughter has to live in, and my greatest desire is to point towards Christ in my words and in my actions. I hope you all hear my heart, this post is not meant to be a judgment on others, only a reminder for us all to be kind to one another and to remember to show grace and forgiveness when we or someone we love is treated unfairly.

Thank you all for your continued prayers for our family as we face new challenges as Ella grows! May the Lord bless you today!!   


  1. Such cute pictures! I don't have any little ones to talk to about being mean, but appreciate what you're doing.

  2. I'm sorry Ella's experiencing this.

    Olivia is going to be 10 (!!!!!) and has always been comfortable with her scar. She wears bikinis to the pool and doesn't think twice about it. I will never forget the nanny coming home to tell me about one experience Liv had with a friend. They were at the pool sitting at a table chatting away. Her friend was talking but stopped mid sentence and said "OMG Liv, your chest! What happened? Are you ok?" (She was very concerned). Liv dismissively replied, "Oh, I'm fine. It was just my heart." And they immediately went back to their chatting a mile a minute.


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