Monday, March 25, 2013

misunderstood.

After writing my last post about different experiences we have faced in the hospital, I received some negative feedback that I feel the need to address. I don't post negative comments here because I don't think it's necessary, but the truth is although they are rare, they happen.

First and foremost I want to clarify that although we have had some bad experiences, overall we LOVE Dallas Children's Medical Center and the care we receive there. We have had MANY stand out nurses, I have raved about them many times here and we know that the actions of some nurses do not represent all of the staff. The blog was written biased off of collective hospital stays not just recent. 

Also I want to clarify that in my last post I mentioned the fact that I am thankful for, and respect nurses. I also talk about how I try to help as much as I can to make their job easier, only not at the risk of hurting my child. I stand by that. I am always as kind as I can be, and I am very thankful for good care. However to those of you who misunderstood and think I am disrespectful to the nurses and see them as the enemy, and that I just get in the way, that is not the case. I'm sorry if I came across too critical.

This blog is a place to document Ella's journey, along the way, it has also become a place for me to share my heart as her mom and to help others see a little bit into what life is like with a terminally ill child. With opening my heart comes the risk of being misunderstood and harshly judged. Granted that the few negative comments have always been "anonymous" and they are inaccurate, they are hurtful just the same. To be misunderstood and mocked is always hurtful.

We are doing the best we can to care for Ella, we are also so very thankful for all of the positive feedback we received on the last post. I am trying not to let the negativity of 2 anonymous people keep me from sharing with the rest of you, but it is discouraging just the same.

In closing, I would like to say again, that I am thankful for and I am respectful of nurses, yes sometimes we receive less then stellar care (if you have ever been in a hospital you know that happens), but we know that nurses work very hard and we know several incredible nurses and doctors that we are honored to be personal friends with. I apologize if my words were misunderstood and hurtful to you in the medical field, clearly, that was not my intent. Those in the medical field have saved my daughters life with their hard work, my gratitude is deeper then I could ever express.

Thank you all who choose to follow Ella's journey and thank you all who encourage me to continue to write from my heart. I pray that my words are uplifting and informative.


6 comments:

  1. I never understand why some people choose to take time to be mean, especially in situations they can't even begin to understand. If you haven't walked in someone's shoes, you really have no place judging them.

    This blog is one of my favorites because you have such a loving, God-centered family and your posts are always thoughtful and appreciative and loving. Keep on doing what you do and ignore the negativity.

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  2. I am a nurse and have never found anything that you have posted about nurses to be anything other than honest. Nurses are just people and have good days and bad days. Also, in the nurse world, there are good nurses and not so good nurses!!!

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  3. Amy,

    I didn't think your last post was too critical at all. Those things need to be said. There are people working in the medical field that are just in it for the paycheck. I can tell you that I have seen that fact first hand. My sweet mother was in several nursing homes in the last 5 years of her life. She had Alzheimer's and we were at the mercy of other people taking care of her. My mother's short term memory was gone and she couldn't tell us what was happening to her on a daily basis.

    I had to rely on the integrity and honesty of others to tell me the truth. When my mother would cry to me and tell me that she hadn't had her bath on a particular day, and the nurses would tell me that she had, I didn't know who to believe. I walked in Mom's room un announced several times and would find nurses yelling at her. The director at one nursing home told me, "I know I have employees working here that really should be flipping hamburgers at Braum's." It was awful.

    To all who read this that are in the medical profession, I would tell you to evaluate your heart about why you do what you do. If it is just a job and a paycheck, I urge you to find something else. Jesus said in Matt. 25:40 "And the King will answer them, "Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me." Anyone in need of medical care is truly "one of the least of these" and we need to take that very seriously.

    We continue to pray for little Ella!

    Love,
    The Coles

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  4. I didn't find your post offensive either. i LOVE our nurses and have had so many fantastic ones that continue to be good friends of mine! It makes coming back to the hospital like yesterday much easier to know we are surrounded by nurses we know and love and who love our Annabelle. But being in the hospital as long as we have, we have had some not-so-favorite nurses. some of it is just personality clashes, which is gonna happen, dan a few times it was because of some not-so-brilliant nursing skills. I've only had to request not to have one back one time. Nurses do have bad days, and I do tend to extend grace, but that is totally my personality too.

    That said, I almost yelled at a nurse today. Totally not yelling AT her, but I'm sure she took it that way. I told her it was not directed at her but at teh residents that gave the direction she was giving, and that she could go pass on my yelling to them. (long story, but i LOVE Our hospital and rarely put my foot down with a doctor, but this time was so totally totally necessary.) Anyway, it is our job to be our childs advocate while still showing the love of Jesus. That looks different for all of us giving our personality and you're doing a fantastic job with Ella, Amy!!!

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  5. Your comments were valid, and I agree 200%! People in "caring professions" have difficult jobs...but so do the rest of us! If you dislike people, then please do not choose the medical field for your career. My own Father's life was cut short because of two inept nurses and an inattentive doctor. He was the only Dad I will ever have...even if he was just another body in the bed to those "professionals." And the next Monday, when they cLocked in again, we were planning my Daddy's Funeral!

    Amy, you parents of critically I'll children are OFTEN te difference be't life and death for your child. So continue to speak out. Remember this when you think of Ella...TO THE WORLD, YOU MAY ONLY BE ONE PERSON, BUT TO ONE PERSON -Ella -YOU MAY BE THE WORLD!

    Nana to a Heart Baby

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  6. This is your blog, your child, your heart. I am not in your circumstances and though mine are very different, I am sometimes hesitant and concerned about what others will say and the impact it can have on my future sharing. You are a precious and brave mama. Be encouraged and keep writing.

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